Centipede

A bloke was lonely, so decided life would be more pleasant if he had a pet ...

So he went to the pet shop & explained the situation to the Manager but said he wanted an unusual pet ...

After much head-scratching & discussion .. the bloke finally plumped on a Centipede, which came complete with a little box for it to live in ...

The bloke took it home & put it on the table .. then thought it would be a nice idea for him & his new mate to get to know one another over a beer ...

So he asked the Centipede in the box .. "Ere mate,do you fancy coming out for a swift pint" ? ...

But there was no reply from the little box ...

This bothered the bloke, so he upped the ante & asked "How about a pint,followed by a curry then" ? ...

Still no reply ...

So he thought,I'll give the ungrateful little bugger one more chance ...

"Oi ,you in there,cloth lugs ...how about a pint,a curry & there and back in a Taxi .. all on me" ? ...

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Then a little voice came from the box "I heard you the first time,you impatient sod .. I'm just putting my shoes on".